How To Tell If He’s The One

Whether you believe in soulmates or not, the idea of someone being ‘The One’ for you is a comforting yet baffling concept all of us have thought about.

Whether it involves the same goals for the future, the same sense of humour, or the level of comfort where you can feel the most “you”, it’ll definitely hit you when you find a special SO to settle down with.

Today, these married Singaporean women who’ve been through thick and thin with their partners, tell us the defining moment(s) that made them decide to say ‘I do’.

He loves me when I’m at my worst

I knew he was ‘The One’ when we both got home exhausted and drunk, and he still gave me a foot massage before passing out. He had seen me at my absolute worst so many times and yet he stood by me unconditionally—even when I knew he didn’t necessarily agree with my views. And he still surprises me after ten years.
Sal, 38

When he makes it a point to always make things right after every fight. When I strip away my facades to be vulnerable in his presence and still feel warm and loved because he never judges me. Being around him makes me feel completely comfortable in my own skin. I knew he was the one when I felt my most natural self around him.
Sandra, 26

When you think about your past and realise no other man takes you for who you really are like he does. And then you think about the future and realise that after living for 32 years, he’s the only one you could see yourself with for the rest of your life.
Ashley, 32

We have the same sense of humour

I knew he was the one for me when I realised we have the same sense of humour. Both of us intend to gas each other by farting at the same time!
Stephanie, 35

He takes care of me in sickness and in health

We were in a long-distance relationship for two years. When I visited him in Hong Kong, I had food poisoning from one of the street stalls and he took care of me for three days straight. He even stayed with me when I threw up. That’s when I knew I loved him—because he was accommodating and loving through it all.
Sara, 28

He respects my body

The very first time I slept at his place when we had just started dating, he let me sleep on his bed—while he slept on the floor. Not once did he try to make a move on me. He respected my body; he respected me. That was the moment I knew he’s a keeper.
Janice, 32

He takes charge and yet treats me as his equal

When I met my husband, I didn’t know he was The One. I just knew he was right for me because he made me feel happy and secure. Even with our hectic work schedule, we’d still feel safe together.

Up until now, he knows how to take charge without treating women as inferior. I also feel that we lift each other up. However, it was when I met his family that I knew he was right for me. It just felt like home.
Christine, 31

He’s my number 1 fan

He gives me full support in whatever I do. He gives me room to spend as much time as I want on my passion for dance without any complaints and he even attends all of my performances. He’s the best cheerleader I could have and he always throws ideas in for my dance routines. I think that’s what made me very sure that he’s a keeper.
Elsie, 32

We understand each other even without words

We’re not married…yet. But engaged! We feel in sync with each other and I can’t imagine life without him. We have this deep unspoken understanding. When I’m insecure, he reassures me. When I know something might trigger him, I consciously make an effort to avoid it.
Hashy, 23

Also read:

I Got Together With My Boyfriend On A Dating App After One Date, Now We Are Getting Married

He makes me feel wanted in his life

At the beginning, I had plenty of doubts about our relationship. He was a former playboy known for his Casanova tendencies. It took a whole lot of drama and tears before I knew he was The One. He did whatever it took to make me feel like I was wanted in his life for the long run. He loved talking about the future that we’d build together—in a four-room flat to start our family, of two girls and a boy.
Ann, 25

I got knocked up

I knew he was the one when I pissed on him while I was drunk and he never shamed me for it. Also, he loves my craziness and makes it seem so normal. But I married him because my eggo got preggo.
Amanda, 23

He’s The One

Sometimes love can strike you at the most unexpected time, and other times you’ll just know when it’s the ‘right time’ for you. But whether or not you’ll ever get married, finding someone who can love you for you is the only blessing you really need.

Cover: Source
This article was first published on 7 April 2017 and last updated on 25 November 2023.

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19% Of Singaporeans Had More Than 8 Partners Before Getting Married, 40% Married Their First Love