Mothers are admirable for many reasons ‒ from going through the pains of delivering a baby to taking care of their child 24/7. To put it simply, they are literally Wonder Woman IRL.
Apart from the hardships of raising a child, some of them also withstand the judgemental eyes of society when they breastfeed in public, despite it being a natural process to feed their children. While breastfeeding in public is becoming gradually more acceptable in today’s society, we asked 6 mothers in Singapore to share their opinions on the topic.
“Mothers would all agree that it can be a hassle to bring out milk and bottles, especially when you’re out for a long period of time. There is already so much other baby equipment you need to carry with you like diapers, and breastfeeding offers a better alternative.
Between a wailing, hungry baby and breastfeeding in public, I think the latter is a more considerate action. I will feel paiseh if my baby cries uncontrollably, and I prefer to calm him down immediately by breastfeeding.
Strangely enough, I don’t actually see mothers breastfeeding their babies in the public, and I feel that most of them would prefer to do so in a nursing room. The private space makes it easier for the mother to hold the baby and helps to also prevent exposing their breast by accident.”
– Helen, 28
Image courtesy of Kim
“Having had two children, one of whom I still breastfeed at 2 years old, I’ve always breastfed in public. As long as you have a nursing cover on, I don’t think it is an issue ‒ people do look, but most of them empathise with having a new baby.
It’s sad that mothers have to feel apprehensive about doing something as natural and wholesome as feeding their children in public places. Although most malls have a nursing room these days, you’re not going to want to run to a secluded corner to feed your hungry, wailing baby especially when you’re dining in restaurants or even outdoors.
Men are all about revealing clothing, but when it comes to seeing a bit of boob for the purpose of feeding a baby, suddenly it’s all sorts of disgusting. The problem is educating the public that breastfeeding is a natural thing and that is the only reason why women have breasts.
For new mothers who are considering breastfeeding in public, I will say that your baby is more important than public opinion. Even if you have to whip your boob out to feed your baby without a cover, do it.”
– Kim, 30
“As I was in a mummy group where everyone would try to breastfeed, it was comfortable to see that everyone else was also doing so in public. I find it more convenient as I won’t need to carry a huge bag filled with feeding bottles, formula milk, and milk warmer.
With an increasingly informed public who are now more receptive to breastfeeding, I don’t think mothers are as uncomfortable about breastfeeding in public as before. Some people might find it awkward for them because they are not familiar with the concept of breastfeeding, especially those who do not have children.
For new mothers who are considering breastfeeding in public, note that people will glance out of curiosity and not because they feel offended. If that happens, keep calm and continue to nurse your child.
If you’re uncomfortable using a nursing cover, plan your trip around places that have nursing facilities. A quick search on Google will do the trick.”
– Natalie, 37
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“Unfortunately, I don’t see many mothers breastfeeding in public despite it being more convenient. The reason is probably that we don’t feel 100% comfortable feeding an attention-grabbing, crying baby outside while possibly being leered at in a sexual manner or being judged.
Instead, I think there can be an organisation that is pro-choice towards feeding children in general. For example, not shaming mothers for any of their feeding decisions such as using formula milk, breast milk, or even both.
A couple of suggestions for raising awareness of breastfeeding include placing signs that indicate certain areas are breastfeeding-friendly zones to help people overcome the stigma. Another method can be engaging influencers who are new mothers to raise awareness as part of a campaign to normalise it. Instead of legislation alone, these methods will help to overcome the social barrier.
Ignore the haters, and remember that you are doing what is necessary and highly normal for you and baby.”
– Jessica, 32
“I am from the baby boomer generation, but there are even more traditional elderly who are not used to seeing mothers breastfeed in public. They are usually the ones who “reprimand” mothers for breastfeeding even when they have a nursing cover on. I have no issue with mothers who do so and I even show my respect to them.
I didn’t breastfeed my daughters back then because they couldn’t latch on and after several tries, I decided to use formula milk instead. However, if I had the chance, I wouldn’t mind giving breastfeeding another shot.
Breastfeeding is a natural behaviour for mothers to feed their babies, and it should be normalised. There are possibly a few ways to do so and educate others on breastfeeding such as including breastfeeding in the syllabus of health education for secondary school kids.
It shouldn’t be taught to only girls, but also to boys so that they will learn that breastfeeding is a normal and natural process. This way, they won’t grow up having a stigma towards mothers who breastfeed in the public.”
– Judith, 60
“I used to be shy about breastfeeding in public and would always look for a nursing room nearby to feed my child. But an incident made me realise that I didn’t need to care about what others were thinking, especially when I was feeding my child.
At that time, my child was crying and hungry, and I was rushing to find a nursing room in a mall. However, luck wasn’t on my side ‒ the nursing room was already occupied. I was definitely anxious because I wasn’t keen on breastfeeding in public since I heard about unwanted attention from passersby. But I had no choice and ended up breastfeeding my child on a bench in the mall.
I was initially embarrassed by the behaviour but after a while, I noticed that I didn’t get awkward stares from other people. It hit me that I was the one overthinking and things weren’t actually so bad.
But for those who still believe that breastfeeding is something that should be done at home, I urge them to stand in the shoes of mothers and try to understand where they are coming from. Sometimes they have no other choice but to breastfeed in public.”
– Julian, 35
The responses from these mothers reiterate that breastfeeding is a natural process and it shouldn’t be something done only behind closed doors. Instead, it should be embraced and respected.
While Singapore still has room for improvement to accommodate mothers who breastfeed in public, it is nonetheless assuring to see that breastfeeding is slowly becoming acceptable behaviour in our society.
Cover: Image courtesy of Kim Wong and Jessica Lai
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