Note to readers: This article contains transphobic statements.
When the Miss Universe Singapore 2024 finalists were announced, Singapore sat up and paid attention for the first time in a good long while. This year marks a new chapter for the 70-year-old beauty competition, which, frankly, has been losing relevance as beauty standards have only grown more diverse and multi-dimensional.
The 2024 edition of the contest is the first year that entry regulations have been loosened. The 28-year-old age cap for contestants has been abolished. Women who are married, divorced, and mothers are also now allowed to compete. Adding to the series of never-seen-befores is, most notably, Qatrisha Zairyah, the first-ever transgender Miss Universe Singapore finalist.
The change in the pageant’s criteria marks a more inclusive vision for the Miss Universe brand. In tandem, Qatrisha’s presence on the roster appears to be a profound step forward for the competition—maybe even Singaporean society overall.
Our country’s acceptance towards queerness has made significant strides in recent times after all. For example, 4 Ministers of Parliament made headlines by attending the recent Pink Dot rally, showing support for the local LGBTQIA+ community despite our nation’s generally conservative stance towards queer rights.
Still, the Internet is what it is. The announcement of the Miss Universe Singapore 2024 finalists came with a barrage of (expected) transphobic comments directed at the 33-year-old fashion advisor and pageant queen. Here’s a taste:
“He cannot accept that he was once a ‘he,’ so why does he want us to accept that he’s now a ‘she’? First, learn to accept who you once were,” is a top comment you’ll find in a video interview with Qatrisha by a local news outlet.
“To empower women, please don’t belittle woman especially by participating in this contest meant for biological women who have genuine, hardships, suffering & resilient stories,” is another one we found, typos and all.
Comments like these are loud and can drown out the gradual, global shift towards diversity and inclusion in the Miss Universe space. Trans women have been allowed to compete since 2012, for one. In 2018, Miss Universe welcomed its first trans finalist from Spain. This momentum continued into last year, when 2 transwomen, Miss Netherlands and Miss Portugal, represented their countries on the world stage.
The world may be ready, but given Singapore’s clear apprehension, Qatrisha is putting herself under a lot of scrutiny. Yet, she believes that her place in Miss Universe Singapore hopefully serves a greater good: spotlighting people, like her, who don’t always have a voice.
“If there is one word to describe me, it’s that I’m unstoppable,” said Qatrisha when asked about why she decided to join the competition knowing the backlash she’d get. “If I have a passion for something, I will make sure I achieve it. It is time for Singapore to know about people like me because we exist in society”.
For those willing to keep an open mind, here is Qatrisha’s story, and all the hardship, suffering, and resilience that comes with it.
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In her own words, Qatrisha was always “soft” as a child. As a young boy, she always wanted to wear her sister’s clothing and was very flamboyant.
“I had the feminine inside me,” she shares.
Being raised in a strict Muslim family meant that she struggled to express her queerness, or reckon with her gender dysphoria. So, she waited until she was 21 before formally coming out as trans. Fresh out of National Service, with all the rights of a legal adult, Qatrisha decided that she would begin taking hormones—her first step towards transitioning.
She began to explore other avenues to express her womanhood, like wearing hair extensions and more feminine clothing, all while saving up to undergo gender-affirming surgery in Thailand.
People don’t understand the mental, emotional, and financial costs that come with being trans. Surgery is expensive, tedious, and painful. On top of that, Qatrisha had to deal with the emotional agony of ostracisation from her family.
Her mother was not supportive at first, and took a while to warm up to the idea that the son she raised was a daughter all along. Today, Qatrisha’s mother doesn’t accept her transition but has come to terms with her daughter’s happiness after gender reassignment.
Her stepfather, on the other hand, remains resistant. It took him 7 or 8 years to even warm up to Qatrisha being in the same space as him. Previously he would not acknowledge her or look in her direction, even during family visits. She hopes that one day, she’ll be able to earn his acceptance.
“I have a full-time job. I live like a normal girl and earn good money. I give my mother money every month, and I think he knows that,” she adds. “He’s just always trying to assess to see if, in the future, I’ll decide to go back to being a man.”
The response from Qatrisha’s family is a mirror to the wider resistance she continues to face daily, even after her transition.
“They see either male or female, they don’t see trans people as people,” she responds when asked about the public’s response to her Miss Universe Singapore placement. “They find that we’re creatures that don’t know the right way. But I did find the right path.”
She understands that social acceptance will not happen overnight. Transphobia is also a worldwide problem, and not a national phenomenon.
“Being a trans woman is never easy. No matter where we go, there will always be challenges, discrimination, humiliation,” she said.
Ultimately, for all the challenges and vitriol she has received, Qatrisha is still happy she transitioned, because it would be worse to deny her true self.
Today, she is legally a woman under Singaporean law. Her gender on her NRIC says “FEMALE” and she is protected by the Women’s Charter—affirmations of her womanhood that no one can take from her.
“This path I have gone through, it comes from my heart. I cannot be a man when my heart is a woman.”
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Amidst the noise, Qatrisha thankfully has a support network.
Her husband, who she met through National Service, has been a longstanding pillar of support. He also has been a constant throughout her transition, even when they were just friends.
Additionally, she cites many friends who have encouraged her to pursue pageantry over the years, to great success. Apart from Miss Universe Singapore, the beauty queen has made her mark on several other global pageant competitions, like Miss International Queen and Miss Equity World Ball.
These pageants aren’t mere beauty contests to Qatrisha either. When asked why she competes time again, Qatrisha cites the importance of advocacy and visibility for her community and beyond. Trans people do not get much positive representation in mass media, so Qatrisha hopes her presence will be one small step towards greater awareness and acceptance in the future.
She also hopes that the media attention she gets can help spotlight the causes she stands for, including a Home For Change campaign she is working on. The campaign seeks to help women with low income find shelter and aid, especially trans women. Currently, Singapore only has one homeless shelter for transgender women, under The T Project.
“At the coronation gala for Miss Universe Singapore, I’ll walk with pride and representation for trans women, but also women who don’t have the platform that I have been given. I will overcome this negativity because maybe, in the future, you might know someone like me, and I hope that you will change your perspective and realise, it’s okay.”
Is Singapore ready for a trans Miss Universe to represent us? Whether we are or not, Qatrisha hopes that we can be, and that one day, we will be.
The Miss Universe Singapore 2024 Finals will be held on 22 September.
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All images courtesy of Qatrisha Zairyah (@qatrisha_zairyah).
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