I’ve always had a hunch that guys watch quite a lot of porn. So for shits and giggles, I checked SimilarWeb, an Israel-based global intelligence company, for the top-visited websites in Singapore.
It’s no surprise Google, YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, Wikipedia, and Twitter are in the top 15. But four Adult sites also made the list, ranking higher than Whatsapp (17th) and Netflix (23rd).
They are:
Xnxx.com (5th)
Xvideos.com (11th)
Xhamster.com (12th)
Pornhub.com (14th)
To put into context how much porn Singapore consumes, the Straits Times is ranked 25th. The only surprise was how Tumblr, where you assuredly get zero-cost, virus-free porn, was placed 26th.
I don’t think watching porn is problematic, but we need to pay attention to young men who are increasingly suffering from erectile dysfunction and seeking help for sex and porn addictions.
In the top 50 rankings, Singpass is only more popular than 1 out of 6 listed porn sites. Thumbs up man!!!
A quick survey of some guy friends and people in the office confirmed most guys watch porn “when the need arises” or when they’re too tired to have sex. Occasionally, porn is used to “spice things up” with their girlfriends.
The guys admitted they usually have “porn stashes” in their computer or hard drive. One named his porn file “AI”, another labelled his “Champions League”.
What was common was the feelings of shame they had when they realised watching porn affected their sex life with their partners.
Another friend confided in me he had problems “getting it up” because of his frequent porn habit. For him, he uses porn to help him wank off and fall asleep. Sometimes, he’ll touch himself while watching porn because he’s “got nothing to do”.
According to Google Trends, Singaporeans tend to search for “sex” and “porn” on Google from 9.00pm onwards, with the search reaching a peak at 4.00am (hey late night owls, we see what you’re up to).
It does paint a sad picture, though. Imagine: random Singaporean dude has just finished dinner at home, he doesn’t have evening plans, and jacks off. Or an insomniac who can’t fall asleep, so he turns to titillating videos online for physical release.
For them, porn becomes a form of escape. When you use porn more for emotional regulation than sexual pleasure, you effectively rewire your brain’s pleasure centres.
Eventually, you can develop a tolerance and have to find more hardcore material to stimulate yourself and find it difficult to get aroused by a human girl IRL.
Personally, I can totally relate. I had a partner who hadn’t dated for two years, prior to seeing me. He relied a lot on porn to get off, which affected his ability to have an erection during intercourse.
In an attempt to cure himself, he joined the NoFap movement and found others on the Reddit thread, an online community which encourages one another to abstain from watching porn and excessively masturbating to ‘reboot’ their sexual drives.
While sex got better, he did have a tough time quitting his ‘drug’.
At the end of the day, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with touching yourself while watching porn. Looking up porn is also a demand that is unlikely to go away and the Media Development Authority acknowledges this.
Though the government agency maintains a “symbolic blocklist” of porn sites, it doesn’t ban Youjizz, RedTube, Youporn, Hardsextube, Pornhub, Porn.com, and Sex.com (Yes, I checked for you horn dogs, so I have to rinse my eyes with bleach).
Maintaining a symbolic blocklist does send the signal that watching porn is bad, and encourages the feeling of shame for those who become addicted to something they’re ‘not supposed to be doing’. Perhaps this embarrassment prevents them from seeking help.
Maybe the first step to facilitating the discussion on how to solve this problem is to admit we all have carnal desires. We could also try to adopt a more open, less judgemental attitude towards how some fulfil their sexual needs.
This way, it might be easier for us to seek help when watching porn gets out of hand. What do you think?
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If you have any opinions on how we can get a better grip on porn-related problems or have anything to say really, email us at hello@zula.sg
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