Dating Thai Disco Girls
Disclaimer: This article is based on the opinion of men who frequent Thai disco clubs and is not representative of all Thai women
*Names were changed to protect identities
When we think of Thai discos or siam dius, we associate it with blaring EDM music, flower garlands and scantily-clad women playing drinking games with men over towers of beer.
In Thai discos, girls (siam bus) take turns to sing or dance on stage. If a club patron takes a liking to her, he can buy her a flower garland to show his appreciation. These flower garlands can start at S$50 and go up to tens of thousands.
After the performance, the girl will entertain her patron but is not required to engage in physical intimacy with him. However, some girls do offer ‘extra’ services to earn more cash.
As a result, Thai disco girls often have a reputation of leeching onto rich men. While we shouldn’t dismiss the possibility of finding love in a Thai disco, it does sound tough.
David, 26, recalls one incident where his friend was cheated of his money. “He fell in love with a siam bu and proposed. Right before the wedding, she said she needed his bank account details to ‘manage their finances’. But one day, she ran away with his money.”
Despite their less-than-stellar reputation, some Singaporean men still prefer dating Thai disco girls over Singaporean women.
Do Thai disco girls make better girlfriends?
The unofficial motto of Thailand is “sabai sabai” which loosely translates to “everything’s chill, relaxed and fine as it should be”.
Some men like Xavier, 24, prefer dating Thai disco girls due to their easygoing nature.
He says, “They smile and laugh a lot more than Singaporean girls. They’re simpler and more optimistic. Many Singaporean girls, on the other hand, have major RBF (resting bitch face) and attitude problems.”
Besides their gentle smiles, some men like Stephen, 25, like how exotic Thai disco girls look. “All siam bus I’ve met have sexy, slim figures, big boobs, sharp noses and huge eyes.”
Thai girlfriends are also perceived to treat their boyfriends better than Singaporean girlfriends do.
Xavier continues, “Thai disco girls make guys feel like a king in a relationship. My friend had a siam bu girlfriend who’d take a warm towel to wipe him down after sex and even give him a massage.”
“Singaporean girls are more pampered. Even when eating prawns, they expect their boyfriends to de-shell the prawns for them, unlike Thai girls who’ll do it for you instead.”
Why do men think Singaporean women are ‘high maintenance’?
Over the years, Singaporean women have not only become more educated but also more successful and ambitious in the workplace.
Some men like Mark, 26, believe this has influenced Singaporean women to expect more of their partners and diminish their ability to make ‘good wives’.
“It’s almost impossible these days to find a Singaporean girl who can cook, do housework and be a good mother to my children.”
“If that’s not enough, Singaporean women also have ‘Alpha-female’ syndrome. They think too highly of themselves, are bossy, arrogant and have too high expectations.”
But how much love can money buy?
When men are able to take on the role of the provider, it can help affirm their identity as a ‘successful man’ and boost their self-esteem.
“When I spend money on the siam bus, I feel good about myself because many of these girls come from a poor background and in some way, I feel like I’m helping them,” says Ben, 23.
If money is in the equation, how real is the proffered affection?
Jacob, 27, believes that “If a siam bu chooses to date you even though you’re not her richest customer, you know she wants you for you.”
Finding Love For The Long Haul
While it’s not impossible to find love in Thai discos, most of the time men leave with nothing but a broken heart and an empty wallet.
While siam bus facilitate the fantasy of having an ‘ideal girlfriend’, it doesn’t mean the majority of local men are unwilling to date or marry Singaporean women.
“Many of my friends date siam bus but still marry Singaporean girls because we have the same cultural background. I personally find Singaporean girls to be more genuine and independent, which is something self-assured men want their wives to be,” says Chester, 27.
At the end of the day, you can’t generalise women based on their nationality. It doesn’t matter if she’s Thai or Singaporean—what’s more important is she genuinely loves you and you, her.
Update: Also read our follow-up story: “What Singaporean Girls Think About Men Dating Thai Disco Girls”
Cover image: Source