We previously wrote a guide on how to improve oral sex skills to give men the best blowjobs. Guys, now it’s time for you to return the favour and go down on her.
Sure, you may be clueless about the female anatomy and just don’t quite know how to make her climax with just your mouth.
But this doesn’t have to be the case. With the right techniques and knowledge of the vagina’s intricacies, you’ll be able to hit all her right spots. Below are 10 tips and tricks you can try to send her into a spate of ecstatic overdrive.
The female orgasm isn’t quite the same as the male one. For most women, it is mental as much as it is physical. So don’t hone in on her clit just yet; instead, get that tongue and those hands working on her other sensual parts first.
Begin by fondling, circling, and licking her chest, which are some of the most sensitive parts of her body. Then, work your way down to tease her inner thighs with your tongue before moving to her clit.
Otherwise known as the “lips”, the labia comprises a pair of flaps that cover and protect her vagina and clit. And unfortunately, it’s often neglected during sex. But it shouldn’t be – it’s packed full of nerve endings that make it extra sensitive.
Before you tunnel into her vagina or graze her clit, give her labia some much needed TLC. Start by kissing and licking her labia slowly and carefully. Then proceed to spread her labia and slide your tongue right in.
With the labia spread, it’s time to meet the main star of the show: the clit. If you’re one of the 1.2 billion men who don’t know where the clit is, here’s a quick anatomy lesson. The woman’s vulva is roughly shaped like a canoe, and sitting snugly at the top tip is a little pearl. This is the clit.
As certified sexologist Gigi Engle asserts, “the clitoris is queen. Always and forever.” Indeed, as the clit has around 8,000 nerve endings, stimulating it is almost guaranteed to make her climax.
But don’t be too eager to pounce on it – you don’t want to hurt her and ruin the mood! Instead, start by circling her clit with your tongue. Then glide your tongue across her clit in an up-down and/or left-right motion. Be sure to check in with her to see which direction she prefers.
You can also suck her clit while you’re at it, but do note that not all women enjoy the sensation. As always, take cues from how she responds to the stimulation.
A good oral doesn’t mean you always have to use your tongue. Complement the tongue action by using your fingers to caress her clit, fondle her labia, or just simply finger her. The combined stimulation from both your tongue and fingers will turn her on and get her right into the mood to climax.
And if your mouth starts to ache from all that licking and sucking? Let your hands take over the work while you rest your jaw before diving right back in.
Yep, you read that right: go ahead and stick your tongue into her vagina. While her vagina is not as sensitive as her clit or labia, it is still plenty sensitive and she may just enjoy the sensation.
Observe how she reacts to it and if she enjoys what you’re doing, switch between licking her clit and penetrating her vagina with your tongue.
Also read:
This one’s not for everyone: if either of you are not comfortable with buttplay, then feel free to skip this recommendation. As the anus is another part of the human body that is filled with nerve endings, you can expect it to be sensitive as well.
Simply get your tongue down there and stimulate her anus like you would her clit and vagina: with a balanced mix of licking and light penetration.
Rimming is a good way to segue into full-blown anal sex. If the both of you are willing to take things to the next level, check out our guide on how to prep for anal sex.
Oral sex doesn’t always mean that she lies on her back while you give her head from in front. Mix things up by trying different angles – you may just find that a position that helps you hit her sweet spots more easily. Here are some quick positions you can try:
For starters, you can try the doggy-style position. More than just a good position for penetrative sex, doggy-style helps by stretching her open, making it easier for you to access all her pleasure points. This position is also great if you’re both into rimming and anal sex.
The expression “sit on my face” may have been the subject of many vulgar jokes, but there’s some bearing to it. It’s a good position that lets you fondle her other sensuous body parts like her breasts and butt while you tongue her genitals.
The Kivin method basically involves her lying on her side perpendicular to your body to form a T-shape. This allows you to approach her clit at a completely different angle, which can be especially stimulating for some women.
The humble dildo and vibrator aren’t just reserved for solo play – they also serve as great tools in the bedroom to enhance the oral sex experience for her. While you’re busy fondling her breasts and nipples, for example, you can insert a vibrator into her vagina for added pleasure.
And of course, if you get tired while performing oral on her, you can give your mouth a break and let the toys do the work instead. Check out our recommendations on the best sex toys to use.
But if she doesn’t relish the idea of using sex toys, respect her decision and put them away.
Words have an immeasurable power in a variety of contexts, and oral sex for her is no exception. A well-placed remark like “oh, you taste so good” or “sit on my face” indicates how aroused you are by her, and it can work to arouse her in turn.
Of course, don’t overdo it and emulate what you see in porn – you don’t want to ruin the mood by peppering her with clichéd one-liners that are hollow and totally-not-sexy.
And if she doesn’t enjoy dirty talk at all? Just don’t do it. Period.
This one is a bit of an extension of talking dirty, except you don’t actually say anything. As you give her head and interact with her body, make primal sounds like moans and hums to show that you’re turned on by what you’re doing.
As a plus, the vibrations from your moans and hums will serve as an added layer of stimulation to her sensitive parts as you run your tongue over them.
Giving a woman good head isn’t super complicated – you just need to know what to do and where to target. Remember not to neglect her clit and labia, and most importantly, both you and her must enjoy yourselves. And with that, happy licking! 👅👅👅
Cover: Source
Also read:
Just girly tings.
A K-beauty lover's dream.
Take notes if you're looking to plan a smaller wedding.
Another way to doll up your Labubu.
One month of discounts?! Yes please.