Your first time having sex is not supposed to hurt. When he threatens to find another girl if you don’t have sex with him because “it’s just what guys need”, ask him to get out of your bedroom.
You’ll find white vinegar and cold water take the blood out of sheets.
The boy with the dark hair and the dreamy smile, he’s no good. When you find another girl’s underwear in his room, leave and never see him again. But because you are stubborn, you will keep loving him and that’s okay.
You need to learn about pain.
The man you fall in love with next will be a predator, even though you think it’s love. No normal 22-year-old will bang a teenager in their car. When he tells you about Lolita by Nabokov, don’t romanticise the characters in the novel.
You’ll pay for that with many years in therapy.
When that group of girls in school corner you and ask if you shave your pubic hair, say no and don’t be ashamed. Though they’ll twist their faces and inform you that you’re gross, know it’s not true.
Tell them to stick it up where the sun doesn’t shine; your body’s natural form is not disgusting.
When the stranger on the bus puts his hand on your ass, do not remain silent. Screech and scream and shriek. You must learn to raise your voice when the situation calls for it—those who do you wrong want you to be frail and voiceless.
No one is to ever touch you without your permission.
You’re not weak because you think about dying. You’re not weak for taking the blue and white pill. You’re not broken, and you don’t need fixing—you just need a little help, that’s all. Not all psychiatrists are good at what they do. If you don’t like them, request for another.
You have to learn to trust.
Not every guy you have sex with will end up being the love of your life. If they tell you they don’t want to be in a relationship, believe them. Don’t stick around and hope they’ll change their minds.
You will get the hang of letting people go someday.
When a guy you’ve just met an hour ago begs to forgo a condom, leave. Do not risk your health for a night of mediocre sex with someone you’re never going to see again. He’s really not that good in bed anyway.
Stand your ground because nobody else can do it for you.
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Eventually, something will feel wrong and you’ll go to the doctor. They’ll tell you that you have chlamydia which will scare the shit out of you. But it only takes one pill to cure it, and you should stop being afraid of getting tested.
Health problems happen to everyone—you are not dirty.
The older man you meet at a dive bar will end up occupying the better part of your brain for a few years. Now is not the right time to be in love with him, but good things come to those who wait.
It’s possible to admire somebody from afar.
Your first orgasm will be with a guy you will have an ardent summer liaison with, but it will be dead the moment you pack your luggage to board the plane from Beijing to Singapore. Let the affair remain in your memory; it will never survive the distance.
Flings don’t always need to end in heartache.
The perfect love does not exist. Fighting is a normal part of relationships. What you need to remember is that you do not have to fight dirty. You play for the same team so don’t raise your voice to someone you love, call them names, or drag the past up to prove a point.
Don’t let them do it to you either.
You might never find ‘the One’. It’s perfectly fine. There is an infinite number of people who can make you happy in this world and worrying about the future won’t make it easier when they leave. People don’t always stay together.
But it doesn’t mean true love doesn’t exist.
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