If you’re approaching your mid-twenties and are of the female species, you would’ve probably been asked, “When are you having kids?”
While these nosy but well-meaning friends/relatives/parents probably have good intentions, hearing the question one too many times will probably make you want to punch them in the throat.
So to put a stop to them discussing your reproductive capabilities once and for all, we scoured the internet and created a list of comebacks you can use.
Annoying person: So are you thinking of having kids?
Me: When are you having more kids?
Me: I’ll have one when you do so they have friends to grow up with.
Annoying person: So when are you going to have children?
Me: *puts on my best smile*
Me: I saw yours and decided not to have kids.
Annoying person: Heard you and insert-boyfriend’s-name are getting married, when are you all having children?
Me:
Also Me: “Only He knows. It is His plan. Psalm 127:3.”
Annoying person: You’re not getting younger, when are you having kids?
Me: As soon as I learn how. Do you have any tips?
Annoying person: See my kids so old already, when you having yours?
Me: You take care for me ah.
Annoying person: So do you see yourself having children in the future?
Me: I believe in the equilibrium of the circle of life. For me to bring a child into the world, someone has to die.
Annoying person: When you going to give your mum a boy or a girl?
Me: I have a few kids, one in Taiwan, one in Malaysia, and one with a siam bu.
Annoying person: Do you want children?
Me: *opens Telegram/Whatsapp*
Me:
Annoying person: You’re not getting younger, you know! When are you going to make babies?
Me: K, I make one tonight.
Asking when you’re having kids, though annoying, is generally a harmless and poor attempt at small talk. So if you care about having a positive relationship with said offender, just put on a big smile, say you’re trying, and move on.
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